Personal Empowerment vol. 5: “Championship Lessons For A Winning Life”

Coach Viliami Tuivai | Motivational Speaker | Life Champion > Blog > personal development > Personal Empowerment vol. 5: “Championship Lessons For A Winning Life”


Personal Empowerment vol. 5: “Championship Lessons For A Winning Life”

April 18, 2018 | vchamp | personal development

"Championship Lessons "

Whether we win or lose, we must always find the lessons to learn and apply as we move forward.

1. Motivation: More Than a Noun

When you wake in the morning, every morning, what drives you? In current discussion this is called your “why.” The reason you put on that suit, drink that extra cup of coffee, bang out that extra rep at the gym, or whatever else it is you do. Why you do it will ultimately control how long you do it and the enjoyment you get out of it.

For some people it is their families; the people who depend on them. For others it is to make a lasting difference or legacy in the world. Whatever that “why” is, it will keep the fire burning.

No matter who you are reading this, following our video series, and looking for that champion life, you are at one of these positions along the journey:

  1. Haven’t yet identified your “why”.
  2. Have identified your “why” and are beginning to pursue your goals with that driving you.
  3. Have achieved great success through your “why” and look forward every day to achieving even more.

The thing is, no matter which of the three positions you would say you currently occupy, you have to keep moving.

If you’re stuck at #1, reach out to your trusted network with questions about what they see as your interests and passions. At the same time, reach into your soul. Dig deep and find what energizes you.

If you’re at #2, congratulations! You’re that much closer to the life you want. Stay the course. Set short term goals and knock them down regularly. In the NBA they say a lot of guys need to see that first shot go down. Mentally watching the ball go through the hoop sets the tone. It builds confidence and just acts like a snow ball picking up momentum rolling down the hill.

Those little, regular goals act the same way.

For those already at #3, just be mindful of the complacency that can set in. It’s natural. But, we can fight it. We must fight it. It’s great to be a champion once. Even greater to be a champion forever.

2. Whining Gets You Nowhere

I’ve mentioned before how great of a parallel sports is to life itself. The concept that whining gets you nowhere is just another such way that we see a tremendous overlap.

Turn on the TV any given week for a football game, or evening for a basketball game, baseball game, you get the picture. And I promise you that you will see players and/or coaches arguing with the officials. Now, in my experience as a player and a coach, I have never once experienced an argument with one of these referees where they said, “you know, that’s a good point. I was wrong. Call reversed.” Of course, in many sports now they do offer instant replay, and calls get overturned. Keep in mind, this process is only allowed for a select few circumstances and it requires a specific procedure and the standard is “uphold the call on the field BUT FOR irrefutable evidence.” This means that, what, 90% of all calls we think are bad never get turned into our favor? So, what does the whining and complaining get you?

And here’s something else to consider. Even if you think, “nah, Coach V, I’m going to blame others,” that’s certainly your right but keeping this on the football field, after a bad call against you, as a coach you still have to call plays, players still have to execute. You can’t “blame your way down the field.” If you felt so aggrieved that you just had to keep dwelling on it, you’re going literally get multiple delay of game penalties and end up shooting yourself in the head (not just the foot). So, don’t let that happen.

Bad things happen. Uncontrollable things happen. Whether I’m a great coach, a great motivator or anything else you turn to me for, I can’t keep those things from happening to you. You can’t do it for yourself. What we can do is push through regardless. What we can do is learn the lesson regardless. What we can do is keep trying to improve. 

That’s what I’m here to help with. That’s what I’m here to help you recognize. Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we respond.

Don’t respond by whining and placing blame. Respond with strength, dignity and the understanding that whatever adversity presents itself today can be overcome. You have that power.

3. Winning Never Gets Old

No matter how many gurus and coaches and motivators come along and reframe our thinking of losing, no matter how they redefine it for us, I promise you, it never gets fun.

You can be in sales and “go for the no.” I get it. Rejection and loss are difficult pills to swallow. By approaching that rejection with enthusiasm we can trick our brain in a given moment to not shut down. If that keeps you pushing toward the one “yes” then by all means, whatever you have to do. Do it.

Just understand, the reason you have to essentially trick your brain or learn to approach the loss that way is because losing SUCKS! It just does. It’s also inevitable. We’re all going to lose at something. How we respond to the loss is what makes us champions. How do you respond?

When you ultimately win, do you relish in the great feeling and just let the enjoyment wash over you? Nothing wrong with pouring a little champagne in the locker room or dumping the gatorade on the coach in the immediate aftermath of the win. It feels GREAT!

Just don’t let it go to your head. Don’t stay popping champagne 3 months later. There’s another season headed your way, another obstacle to be ready for. Be ready. Enjoy the win. But be ready.

4. Family [Dys]Function

If ever you doubt the veracity of some concepts of how to live your life, one way to tell if you’re on the right track, find the ideas that are consistent from culture to culture. If there’s a saying in Hebrew, Spanish, Russian, English, Tongan, whatever, espousing the same idea… believe it!

Thousands of miles of ocean and land separate people and if they understand the same truths, yeah, you can probably accept them as standards to follow.

One such standard is airing of family dirty laundry. There quite literally is a phrase or saying for it all across the world. Because we all understand, deep down, we shouldn’t do it.

Keep problems in house, keep drama for the movie screen, and keep your life moving. Even if you find people willing to engage your dysfunction, they are likely even more dysfunctional and you can what, dysfunction together? Where is that leading you? What are you accomplishing in your life in that space? N-O-T-H-I-N-G!

Handle family business as a family and go out into the world with your head high and your feet on the ground. 

5. Aloha Means Hello [and Goodbye]

For those who have been following along this past month, you’ve already read my thoughts about sacrifice and in economic theory the concept is “opportunity cost”. Because our time and resources are finite, we choose what we want directly, and by doing so, choose what we don’t want indirectly. 

Sometimes it’s obvious. To get more muscle tone we must sacrifice our body fat. We put in work at the gym and clean up our diet. That sacrifice is obvious. 

What may not be as obvious is that to get what we want in life, material gains or just quality in terms of happiness, we might have to sacrifice some people, long term relationships to get there. 

We talked on Monday about motivation and the sheer joy we feel around motivated people. Where do unmotivated people fit in then? If they’re relatives, we can minimize our interaction somewhat. Maybe we limit our time spent with them to just big family functions and holidays. If their lack of motivation is benign, we can maneuver around them and keep moving. Close friends as well. We can decide the extent to which we cut their time in our lives down.

What we also must be aware of are the people who are motivated, but in the wrong direction. If you were training wind sprints, you might tie a little sled to your waist and put some weights on it to add resistance. And that is some kind of resistance, no doubt. However, consider tying that same rope or bungee cord to another sprinter and have them run in the opposite direction. If their pull is stronger than yours, not only are you not getting closer to your destination, you’re being pulled completely off course.

To those folks, we must say aloha. Goodbye.

To the ones here to cultivate a championship life for themselves and have shown to be positively motivated in their own lives and working in unison with us… oh man, to them we SCREAM aloha. Hello!

Thank you for following along all week as we shared some of the important life lessons to reaching our championship potential. Be sure to tune in every day for videos and other words of encouragement as we look to get the most out of this thing called life! 

“Life is struggle and struggle is life. Misery is optional.”

"What I believe, will be!


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